Go Your Own Way

I was recently browsing a Facebook group for a couple of different inspirational influencers that I follow and I was shocked at the hate that people were laying down for other people. It’s as though these people expected the influencer that they follow to stay in the lane that brought them to the influencer. My gut reaction was that I wanted to defend the influencer and tell them how rude they are being. Then I realized a couple of different things.

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Episode 4: Go Your Own Way

Failing Imperfectly
Episode 4: Go Your Own Way
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When we follow others, we open ourselves up for things that don’t serve us. It’s time to let those go and go your own way.

Finding Motivation

Motivation is a bitch to find. Some days it is slapping us in the face and other days it is nowhere to be found. Days can go by before motivation shows up and then it disappears before it makes any kind of difference. Nothing can be done until motivation shows back up. Just waiting for motivation to come back.

Does this sound like you? Are you sitting around, waiting for motivation to do that thing you keep putting off? Why? Seriously, why are you waiting for motivation?

Motivation isn’t something you will always have. The top one percent of performers aren’t always motivated. Motivation doesn’t come natural to anybody, even that top performers. You know what comes naturally? Procrastination. Laziness. Waiting.

Life isn’t about finding the motivation to get things done or waiting for motivation to start working towards that goal. You have to manufacture motivation. You have to be consistent. You have to do that thing even when you don’t feel like it. If you keep waiting for motivation, if you keep waiting to feel like doing it, you will get nowhere.

How do I know? Fucking experience.

Ha, yeah right. I’m sitting here reading this blog. You have to be motivated to keep up the schedule of posting that you do.

No. I’m not motivated every single day to get a blog post written. I’m not motivated to share my thoughts all of the time. As I’m sitting here writing this post, I have procrastinated on my goals this week, including writing. I’ve talked to those close to me about starting a podcast. I’m not motivated to record audio, so I haven’t done it. Writing is easy, recording audio is not. Even though writing is easy, it takes effort. And truthfully, I may have just said it was easy, but it isn’t always. Sometime I can’t come up with anything to share with you. Sometimes I procrastinate because I’m in a mood and can’t figure out what to say.

I am not always motivated. The only reason you see such consistency with these posts is that I am determined. I am determined to put my thoughts and my learnings out there. I am determined to be the friend, sister, role model, mentor, confidant, whatever, that I never had until I started my own personal growth journey. Even if this is the only post you ever read of mine, my goal is that you take something away from it. This may sound like motivation and yes, it kind of is. But putting thoughts and feelings out to the world and people I don’t personally know is not motivating. It is scary.

Motivation doesn’t always show up in my life. Determination and consistency doesn’t always show up. Procrastination is a bigger player in my life than I care to admit. But you know what? Every time I push through that procrastination and get something done, my motivation meter fills up a little.

Whatever you keep putting off, whatever you want to do, just make it happen. Take the first step. One step at a time. That is all it takes. One step.

The Power of Fear

Fear has power over each and every one of us, even if we don’t want to admit it. Fear is a natural basic instinct that can easily control so much of what we do. I, from personal experience, know how debilitating life can be to live through the power that fear has over me. It is exhausting and stressful. It can be crippling.

How does fear have that much power over one person? Because we keep it all in and don’t share what we are afraid of. We don’t tell people. We don’t talk it out. We don’t write it out. We bottle it up so we won’t look incapable or weak.

This has been my life. I know I talk about fear a lot, but I do it because it is something that I am always working through. Fear is not simply something we can overcome once and be “cured” of. Fear is something we will work through for the entirety of our lives. The power that fear has over us is something we will continue to work through and against.

Something I learned about the power of fear that I didn’t realize that I had learned until I read this sentence in Worth It by Brit Barron, is that every time I write or speak about my fear, I am taking away the power it has over me. Do you journal? Do you complain to your friends about things that you won’t admit are fears? Me too. Do you feel better when you do these things? Yeah, me too. Those actions are reducing the power of our fears, even if we don’t realize it.

Every time I share something here with you when it is heavy on my heart or just by starting to type about something that is bothering me, I am reducing the power that the fear I have has over me. Sharing my story with you reduces that power. And you know what, it can reduce the power your fear has over you to.

You are here reading this post about fear and you probably have already thought of many fears that you don’t want to share with people for whatever reason. Or you’ve read a few of my posts and relate to them. A lot of them are about my underlying fears. If you relate to anything I am sharing and feel even a smidge better after reading it, you are also reducing the power your fear has over you.

You don’t have to have a public website to write out your fears. You don’t have to share them with friends. But if you share your fears with a piece of paper and a pen, if you write them out, you will start to feel so much better and you will start to reduce the power your fear has over you. I share with you because I know that I cannot be the only one going through this life with these fears or issues. No, we might not have precisely identical fears or issues, but there can be some sort of similarity. I am sharing so I can hopefully inspire you or be a mentor to you that you’ve always hoped was out there. I am sharing to let you know that you are not alone. And I am sharing because writing it out lifts a giant weight off of my shoulders.